[Untold Tales Pic]



Written between April and December 2000 using the random sentence generator Sgen 1.0 with a database of approx 250,000 words, Whelk is a savage indictment of contemporary dumbed-down culture, a transcendental journey and a masterpiece of erotic suspense cum bikers handbook.

I am when sweetly singing
Trapped in january moon
Where the sea of knowledge shall have knowledge beyond zoom
Yon buckle of eat-a-barley jacket
Has fun with such a well-proportioned sentence
Inwear wonderpies contradicts demicunt sheeting setter
Spatial context of evil
In the strange stargazey stranger's eyes
The sexatronic rays
Prompt of japan
Chancegun of dreams
Sho-nuff wing of easel
The man who emptied escher's ink
Listen with an alien species
The fabulous kinky handshake bra
More rectal mucus
Mister cool's mouse
The singing soup of loonatium
Still life with wagner's tits
The mysterious case of the cucumbrian nudes
Snafu-bokulus devil's vulva
Heaven walketh arm in arm with fortune
Bubblegum under kumtruffle
Klinobush kahuna
The little people's chinese world of emulsion
A bit of imaginotion
Priestly lurkola
Curviness in outer space
The strange mingedrummer de la nuit
A sexuality of gussets
Mustapha pope dance music
The shit-eating sex manual of the urals
Yakostunner #9 annabelle salt wallpaper
Sprinkled with fear of enormity of dreams
Rockport scarfostia plate
Alien slow dreamy sounds of pancake
Twins of confectionite xmas meat

Born squishy
Half a weasel
Penetrated the darkness of tuscany's sunset
No more than a summer's dayhole

In the depths of the cyberian winter
Sheep-worrying fish
A barmaid brindled
Bunty column-cum-lately
Acidic hoop snatches

Whatever together with lipstick soup
"The Cosmic Swinger Mills!"
Somebody's stepmonster
Muffy, the bumfire specialist
A wranglered pelvic arch
Tincture of plainclothes sex
Excited her with a magical potion
It was christmas day and a famous soprano
Some slacksymbola-cola snapper
Devil-fame on a shoestring
A great bucking template of love
Frodosnorts of the blubbershred condition
Superchefique like interclamola
When the atom split
More tasty than irving klaw
Dennis the donut
The gasses of the masses
Richmond denim warpstalker
A cuntinuum
Snatchwar storygirl missimo
Trillo-hockey spam
The boys own book of lumpofcheese scuttlering
Sailing on dawn's vegetable
Deeply that informal prankster
Membrane-maidens when the lights go out
www.gaggo-muffus quo robbie tosspotmere macgnome
Open to the stars that avoided the issue
Lap-pony jasper
Discharge of evilberries at last
Leucovault and carrots
Man-depth of terror with queerchipshopscene
4th cream sodaceous

The softer than soft world of wobbliness
Whelkdom's sequence
Divided by celebrity
Samantha hare squawking in a bath
Of howl of physical love
Some kind of magquillitron pie of kissicide
Lord byron's heroin
The viper's elf
Splatto-slide monthly
Hockeyfeathers with the merest hint
In the manner of essence of trollope
With lashings of a member of the church
Some high quality beaver
A bottle of skopes bonkers wine
Put the pie of stern wealth in her mouth
The blindfold tongue-tickling krew
Delivered from her fruity temptation
Bent over balls of fluff
Was moon of cream sodawood!
Exposed her dear sweet little morning
Her peasant's shoulders
A fantastical creature read us true stories
Power-kissing Sex-lamprey murdered me

From the planet steaming whelk
No.1 quimburger-in-the-house
Led into her sweet polluted oxidised flesh
A flan of pots
Given to groping a zealous puritan
Bossier than yath's laces
Ectomadness of dreams between
Sex with the portaloo of truth
The starving fed upon each other
Some maltese whelk-pickers of the one-stop jizmo
The zigzagazoo
Kumhardener simpson
Darkly squeezing london
Babes of thought-spreader with a wise expression
Preferred the company of a devious clay plank
She was saucily dripping
Holiday in vulvanio famoso
A piece of dirt-slurp-girl
Her gorgeous division
Wanted to go on daddy's hole
Her little titties, barely audible, swooning and symbolic,
With a smelly home and morally lacking disposition
Wanted to feel his arms around ayers rock
Behind the glistening wet rubber
Sublime experience of slop
First her front bottom, then billy bunter's sausage
Teen oddity spots dripping with sexihowler monkey
Over-on-of klok
Darklanguage of pestilence
Autodisco in palfrey de la lune
Sat down to think about rapunzel's bulge
Mince and cumbag and fear
50 million tight-lipped gourmets
From the bottom of her whelk
Kummimilkshake from heaven dreemo
Julie ewbank with the whole of the magic squirter of monaco
This and that had sex
The bungle in the jungle
Baked a twister's kinky boots
To remain forever otherwise
Goes up with the x-toll boothman
Felt the smoothness of a great martian beauty
No.4 is at onelegged smuggler university doing miss weekend studies
A kaleidoscope of improbable shapes and colours
The most failed of all god's potholers
As i trembled with anticipation
She opened the eyes of jeek's finch
The looniweed busters
Lucy da joose
Headwood-related anxiety
Lard-of-sound records
A misspelt youth
The puckered pen
Jamkharki in the shape of
Cilla steak farting
To retching crackdung
Hur dush
The puffballs of cyberia
Welcome to meworld
Cyberwaggle sniffer
Undertones pitcream
Superfallopian tubestick
Armani zimbeeposity parties
Horseman in the guise of balsawood
It was absolutely eggy!
Had all the ingredients to make holly hunter
Some clicknads?
Headflam orbiter opera
Paracabinet of oral fun
Nudie walnut bantu
Walt whitman's gusset
If those frazzled dreams fit
Then it's furniture's sweet lumps
That attracts dust
In a papier mache escarpment
The life and times of a complete and utter bunch of arse
Holy pedalbin of love no-problemate
Sexy secondax susanna rockadelic droid
Jizmo-french kelly
The small-screen wives of the undergloom
The bubbling, dripping silence
Diadora dough d'amour
The invasion of the dumpling-headed reindeers

Sidelong moist glowfish
In bed with curdled moosepaste from out of time

Her practice bumhole's modernisation
Caught on the hook of fidel castro's lust
Trouting 8 lumpen
Her thighs pushed his long hard fluff
Into her breast augmentation
The cream and creaminess of blithe
Miss secret significant frills
Rejoicing she grew sick
Here in popcelebrityhampton
Barbara eden's navel tightly gripped


The stuffdepleted heap of haphazard poetry
Coated with an adulterous alien extrusion
Dust-guzzlin' slutz
Like only yesterday
Put the softie essence of barley in her mouth
Autonarrative's arse frolicked
The strawberry wet wonder
A zapconjunction of delight
It was the beginning of the super-bubbly teenage hot season
Mountain coolslop of creation
The good pies of jesus
Wearing the headphones of war
Teen pineapple of extreme pleasure
Dripping with wet teen agreement
Da teenie state of blissmark scree
For sgt pepper's KANDY
The whole of our teeno-station smith
The one who put complex cool in her mouth
A spartan mango without dates
Scruffily joop
Oh-so-suckable flesh
In your head-based product
Histragon's turnip
An eye-opening crow, mute and badly butchered
In deepest muff
Her delicious golden coating
Wet with strutting
On dream-skinned asphalt
Overlooks stones of silence
No better than teenage bustle papers
This departing silky-tongued religion
Marmaduke's swooning fleece
Prejudice in paste
A wet-lipped dream's angularity

Cabbage-eater vomit
Primaflange from the slime
Lotteryvision best motorwaysex
Damian, the plum of penis!
The Daily Telepath
Darklys anatomica beatnica
Miss fatarse
Bumpjam spam
Heights of hawkshade
The berlei bosom-squisher
Nosewoofer bar for holofantasarium
The minotaur and the daleks
A hazard of glitches
An anarchotudor bluebell without beauty
These elegant monkeys
Sounds of acolytes in their underwear
Bubblegum skunk all over the world
The pies pulled her chuff out
And her whelkier glistening buttocks
Milk chocolate and english
An obscure branch of conception
Drinks blood thru a straw
To all-girl geezermuff
Jerko-gaggo-retch in chains
In spite of a warbling harris
Fuurg pisooska
Miss zozo moondust

In her damp wet unimaginable place
A young nymphonian female
Dogpole of insurgency
Slurptwisto gelato
Deeply patricia pussypants
Snuffed a blonde
Cybermyth of
Dreemo-indent in the mind divide
Boozo-rectal astrotundity with fries
Darkcassetteless astrofuture
Average blood-spider
Hanging on his ally capellino nipplewash
In her pinkness, this hazelnut was playing
1st sack up hamwealth
Down at the end of darkly street
Her milky white moustache
Witness of pure sex
The creamwhelk
Over easy mucksquelchiness of sexual nature
Ye olde bopper shopper
At last a load of stick of stutter-bizmo
The viveur and the voyeur
How darkly imagined that
Intermartian schoolgirls from hell
The music of next tuesday
He waited his turn on her false leg
Profoundly dumb and doomed
A load of sluttish bridesmaids that tasted of burl ives' groat

The open-mouthed reduction of subtractia
The world's biggest tongue-stud
In a room full of naked men with erections
The ladies who do it with stockhausen's snake
Dongshaap-eating was a mutant with devil's redeemer filled
The magic cucumber of extreme pleasure
Like a teenage slut from heaven
Drive-by poetry from heaven
At university doing crop-circle studies
Like lucybrand at booty camp
With the martian moon in the middle of it's spawn of magic
Elk sick, forsworn and liquid warm
She was basked in the light of the hash bar
Embedded in the porkmandrillo minge-soft soapmonster
Tingly boredom spinakered mildewly into dislocation
Out on moon island
Muborn-aghast nudifications
At random tracy bim sally bimomino

Cruel rubber pants of pure thought
Tweaked a pellet
The mighty lampmouse for summer's wondrous lash
Potassium of oral fun blowpipe
Our own vera bees
Dawn's gusset geilgud was chained
Candy strangeness in brine
My teenage nan ran naked thru the fields
The turtle that matched pound for pound louisa's smile
Elle hoop skirtteen
Us-strangeness of the universe
Blasted off the edge of america's puzzle
Tartan sweat-tightener
Liquid parsnipfall
Under the moon that moan
The boiled eggmarks
d) I explained in teenage elfian
Getting an eyeful of the gibbon of french exoticism
Teleways soul up pongo-poophouse
Detritus under belchoscope
In the pool of fools
I gave a gasp when the druid entered
Like what part of an oblique salami attack
Pants in a french manner


Monstrosquiggle and carrots of splatto-marimbafish
Basil full volume sprinkled with stuffo-squirrel of hell
Wet teen cleavage of defence
Bones from underneath the naked angels
September was in english going
Some literary samples and remixes
Panic in large cursive script spread out
Longbottle winetown chants the chant
With half of loonpatch pie
She engulfed the whole of jazz reality
A squelchy thing stood alongside the beautiful elfin princess
With his thick rubber lips, the martian lapper
Lickmascara's pretty young wife, harry
Bit off fluff-arsed bernard
Ambient cinema
Like a jingle giorgione
And the laxative augmentations
Hammer stream of horror presents hank stream in 'this ere chap'
Her year of cheese and chocolate
In a special kind of way, elaine continues to experiment
Innocence and destruction in her white lips
"The worthless ones, the passion of slutty slop!"
Mornibble green grunchen puffshoe
Like a thickening of juices
The company of olaf the fruit bunny

Minced cream of waltz apparel
Snozzle at the ready
The pie of love
The drum solo of goodness
The soft fluffy cross of matt munro
Blackcottage cheesewhelk
Munchpole vaultnut crunch
A piece of midnight obligation
Teenage lemonmaids
An almost gaggo-dips without gaggo-cabbages
Mahler's spire marinaded in a cloud

The squid in thomas hardy's hole
Curse of the holey gravy
In beerjam heaven jumping
Eileen eye tree bosoms?
Supersleepinducing lipstick
Famous for such BBC cleavage
20,000 wings of purpose
In the soft caribbean moonlight
While she screamed jazz desire
On TV with her beautiful darklys dip-eyed innocence
Darkly sprawled naked
Are in yonder 12hr swinging trout
Full fleshy red steam peeled the skin off
Fashion sound in wine sauce
The blackness of the lovely lard
As prophesied paris tokes on darkly
Terrible tart of convulsing screw
Fluffo-moon bootnox

Cacka-ratislavski coated with anthrastoves

Business bracket of clammy lunchmeat
Your own crotchless goatskin boyishness
To dh lawrence's storms in space
Eight mechanical curviness
Urban consumer-tube approximately
Like the magnificent glistening red whelk
Some big red thing's haphazard poetry
The herbaceous border of betrayal
This blisso-swine of desire long brown
Back welled up inside nicole
Devil's flea on ice
Upon certain occasions extrahorrible things suck
Her nose's slurp and thirdly comes down hard
In martian the dreamgirl lived a fantasy
To the sound of the vibes
Granny's university beats
The macerated teeneage mulch disturbed by gladness
Like the evil genius that he was
Pinksupper gardens 5th
Dervishes sweep vermillion
Sylvie, her loveliness screeching
Teenage cumsplash
Her upturned face admired by boils
Talks with ziffusian beer
Tafetta reduced women
High pustule of oral fun
There lies jazz method
Blindfold the cheese!

Troubled teenage martians
Around this softly singing syringe
Martian tracksnap
Pretend magic piece of ass
Hair the colour of beauty's yolk
(i now dooes all the dooing-words)
We danced to the wafer-thin sound of frost

Naked but for lumps of disattention
First its harry play-jazz ancient mildew
Courtesy of a tribe of gorgeous teenage nymphomaniacs
In waiting for the gay spanish monarch
Will push the edges of the great blue swelling
Track 8 bit her lip as she waited for the dead-end girl
Laceys lunchie from nowhere back-to-front
Flaccido domingo

[Being The Beatles]

Wow, that which does not exist grew hair on a historian's poems
While looks down on her great milkfat behind
Mary conditioning! mixed with virgin soulbeer
She blissed him out in a tomb in the hillside

[The Drive-by Poets]

The bad fairy's drums
With a razor prayer
Some kind of arsedairy products
A red panda's cunt
Bumbag of crisps-at-arms
A dish of whelks
5 litres of acid charm
Ford badger fingers
Tessa peasmuff's gunk
Put the legend of painful bob
"Come, let us stick with the sheep"
Miss muffy unpleasantness
Sat on my board in the brine room
Combat blackmass cabs
From the planet of musical noon
Split for an unbearable moment
With the whole of pincer in acanthus
With some bucket of moose in drag
Just about une martienne
An alien skateboard foundered on the coast of wales
Girderlight music of word-haired muriel
Rebellion in the house
The underbanjo's trade
Three moaning headless needles
Planet cosh of london lump
The royal skin times
Lara's zipperjelly
Gave some mighty hard to milliblurt in the slack
Completely exposed the world of the whiskery whelk-eaters
Crazy half of england and the merest part of playtex beans
Language by sheer weight of numbers
I love to watch as she breathes in the dative
Her finest spun shitter
Teenage melting in the nude
The tingling yet french singular speech
His own regenerated wave
Hugged by the martian crypto-steepleniks
Electrified cast
Topped with the blush of an early-morning mist
I am born aghastly well-thumbed
My best brocaded moslem lemon zestman
The best of nasty-flapus magnus song
Veggie-postman of madness
Simple kid ribble bus of loveliness
Eric von puller device
In the invading whelk creatures
Turns out to be nothing more
Than a hunk of near-perfection

Choco-thingo erotico
Nights in limitware
Schott hat of war rent crooked
In a martian dreamgirl's nozzle
She wore darklys fame of ill repute
And a crotch of stings
To meet footloose amoeba fair
Gas fire of pamela anderson's koala
Barry beatle's pint
In a bed of johnny joy of lust

[Another Shocking Case!]

The ballad of jelly jones
Her majesty's crafty old alarmclock
The scream quartet
Tried mademoiselle moon's massage
In love with the trap of entrapment
The royal women's tennis corps
Morgan organ-cone
The girls with all the round numbers
Singing "Oh, most trick and lizzy lord,
The crate of all man's meat,
The krew with a hint of gleem"
And the correctness of her shoulders

Twice free thought lifts
The frankfurt 5 tried to have sex
With the old whelker

Headegg in your head
Beneath a rag of horizontal
BBC tartan
From another dimension
Wobbly in astronomy's babble
Let suck the perfect woman's balcony
Moistened her lips with conspicuous leg of lamb
Under the collective moon


It contradicts what we already know
How vaguely disgusting is it?
Her legs were conventional and topmost
The BBC tartan world of flesh
Underneath padding served with spot
Between two slices of cheese and chocolate
Crazy stillness tumbleth over an alien knight
For heat that brushed her hair with dissipation
Hides but a comedy methodmoist clam to prawn
Pruned-back flashpanda in love to the tolling of the bell
Psychedelic textured castration
Cut a deal for 10,000 shares of and alien traptwang teen
Convertible blanco
The tangerine ants chopper
Clocatross clapusher
Yours, surplus to requirements, loosely woven
Voluptua pearwheel compass
A bit of between the sheets dotchunk trade
A hotskin-by-night situation
The Dung Beatles
In slippers green some egg-shaped postal trousers
Spat hot seed into that shitbag
Baggoshriek of note
Harrods kicknose
Laps up an alien dough
Schott slurp posse kickers
There was existential grease
Teach yourself worries
An imposing whelk's sombrero
Next to the cerebellum's welcome
Teat of slop
Her disco doublet and gown
Long thin frank
The best of rush is a boner's cook
Lousy with indonesia
Some egg-shaped postal trousers
"You and your lumbering, villanous elegies!" Soup of glucose terrier
"Phew, the oval pane of hock!"
She is duckarse in buccephalus
Bonnet of hegel's clamp
As a true whelksman in ancient brighton
Magic gherkin No.4
Felt the warmth of her majesty's eye
Curse of the long confectioner
A scotched earth policy

Lizzie logsnipe dirk gobblercheese
Xylomastpaper smooth and white
The frankenscrolled parrot of the west
In the partial age of kaloona, the space agent
In a land beginning with B
Another sparky but non-progressive carrot
In the dolly night pieworld
Suk-o-dose A
Made covers for kent
The best pump-action savoirfaire
Toffload rack of sprawlmind
Merely a bucket of egg control
Sheena double-bed-based lifeform
In a tree-frog's milk
The dreams of two maids-a-milking
In tandem with the comedy judge
The milkwasp revealed
Trancenesia fast asleep in her pint of gorgeousness
Green groped towards
In the sense of mangled meanings
Celery de groote saphopatch
A softnosed fuzzy lap flounder
Journey into your own scrivenings
This up-and-over bobbie
Aruba-mustard flavour
Easter dub of physical love
Rogered but a cubist verb
For the worshipful company of naked limbo dancers
Who never ate rimbaud's rumba
Philorim shotati
Out of the red, more moody teenage martians
Belch-fluffiness-beast coremill-in-a-jiffy
A bellyful of articulated pretence
Gudgeon in brine, lord of cream of presentium-eyed gloss
Was sent to bed without no soul
Between two slices of slut and orgasm
And controlling mist
Imaginary waterfall bodice ripped open
That drinkobuffalo over easy
French limits kiss of lunchbag-off


An orchard of railroads
"I love the sex scenes," she said, in a really squelchy voice
"Oh, most silly and sudanese lord, the goldmine of jeannie,
The weasel behind the mixer, hear her gasfire we affirm thee"
"Or a field of baaarley proud"
Watch with things that float in front of your eyes
Put manure on a vile whelk

He was on the control deck
Playing some deep martian house
Found lying in a pool of beckett
Kootu-joy fool cucumber
In bed with the freakniks
What is all but dreamjustice
Drank the blood of a moaning meaning
A little bit of remembrance of distraction soup, officer?

Just to the north of the north pole
Puffs darkfinish of england true
Creme de crocus-footed yule
The new wave fumbled with quimquill
The fountain of youth and the toad in the hole in the wind
A negro darkly on the moon
A piece of dust was served
The domain of animal consciousness
Two-part steeped in a rebel cause
Bounded only by the boundless
I ate mystery pie
The venereal green world of the cream and creaminess of blithe
Buffalo jamload and the abstract cordons
Against her softly mutating genitals
In the old whelk shop
The music of the mystery whelk
Lady protracto's proximity
"Breathlessly unending", she said
Under hypnosis this was rebuked by that
On the shores of lake plutonium
Bounced up and down in the alphabet's softness
50 million lucolines of force in motion
Goldilock's deaf-aid
Curryricechips and a large sausage blinked and stared
Disturbed by psychedelic assignation
In bed with a sheep
Nowcorned beef from hell instead
Under the moon that moan the same moistness
A whelk only may
While she played the uncut version of metamorphia
On a diet of alien sanskrit
Snoop doggy dog's listener
A bottle of cauligreen wine


In the most audacious plague of mae west's ecstasy
Sale 22 stone admonition
Stuck a mars bar up the beat generation's crack
Hypnoblubber black
Poking his finger into her enormous cormorant
Bitch-century of greatest thrills
His soul braque's cheese
The gay beatles
Stuck between his witty asides
Sprinti spiritus oar 4th renault plinth
Excellence of collander darkly
On a plate of wah-delight
All but counting down thrice
Praying as she went, a nymphetease
Saying this is how we chill with her juice's gloop
The beady-eyed whelk
Lara flynn martian
From high in the air unwanted
With the mechazoids
Through the bumhole
From the edge of psychedelic laughter
Clickcan of relations for krystal castaway
The strange tongue-pulling battallion
Zolhole of life, texas burning
Fleet of foot, the 4th encryption foot
With tender pieces of some half-price 2nd chunk of honour opening
Dumped his load on a daffodils ruse
The kingdom of the whelk thought nothing except us
Forever all but chum
Plastered with the bagheads
The terror ward that lies beyond
Our own slow dreamy sounds of necessity
Getting into the carriage with the mystical pole-vaulters
Dipsohumanoid of god
With lashings of regret
Zoggolondon busage
Canlock of hairton
Supersnotbatter of tomorrow
Dogendum theatre of cinemapool potwash
Veronica chocolate and cheesegirl churning
In the sunshine
Will cream the gap between popular and fine art
And so in naked martian
Allura amoeba in a bed of blue destination
Burberrys ruin of fury
4th late for the kama sutra's moistened stilton
Their soft bodies disintegrated
In a pick of a bittle
Took the way of may
Depleted jacksocream of presentiums
Nights in interpretation service
Yakelmas eve monday
Nutty volkspouffe
Once again ziffusian lager
Booked into nitrogen overflowing
Low-level music of lululalio light foot looks
A drive-in winter warmer
With hebrew stitching
Delicious hoof eaten with
A piece of three-eyed tortoise

Dis druggy spanish melody of mystery
Was nice to the head of novelty bras
Cunning cool caught half a wicker
Postal to a pile of whimsical celery
Quickened the beaverish oak

Pie in the eyes of god
In the martian by-and-by
Trick destiny puffs
Fashioned a netsuke of his woofo-spatial context

[Trick Destiny Puffs]

Too often prunekrab in a cup
As beastly as the trance of a mouse
Created a new definition of yourself
_ It was christmas day, and tatiana loved plenty of gravy on her tortoise
The lord is thy camera and he shall stalker thy polaroids
Everyone who's ever lived, set adrift in the creative loop
The streets of the noses of the saints
Dat saloon dutch muttress of oldentimes
No more than the brain eater's autobabble
Universe that was born of a christmas cracker
That like her fabulous emptiness
The mysterious case of ourselves
A breath of sunshine eaten with those
Oh, most cherry-lipped and able-bodied lord,
The helping with lashings of the instant
Harlequinetas de cordero shouted
"Her sliding chromatic use of slimy tadpole is disastrous"
Hook and line-brush
Short story gardens
The misty rose gusset
About all abundance of smiling yolk,
Bimbo the Whelk!
Freako-beatlenight's dream
Wet-lipped margarine of december's noise
Camillaparkerbowles pushed his long hard road drill into her eyes
A booklemon curd of lovesong
Diana rigg wallpaper
Souvenir claw of anal pleasure
The bride of the four times half two times table
Younger than coal

[The loop]

Back will come back from behind
Dawn directs some literary samples
And remixes in the code of silence

66 of 161 pages



Bagged Gazunga 1991 Chrysanthemum 49.16742 1992 Cafe of Dinosaurs 1992 The World Tastes of Arsenal 1992 Terms and Contradictions 1993 The OS Report 1997 Last Will and Restaurant 1999 In the Days of The Land of Cockaigne 1999 Untitled 2000